I don't want to be the one carrying the coffin again,
It makes no difference to me if I'm sleeping or awake.
I carry the weight of your world on my shoulders,
I don't need the guilt of the dead.
I couldn't stop the wasps.
The crawl inside and lay their eggs.
I'm eaten alive from the inside out,
I can't tell black from white anymore.
I'm spoiled meat,
Even the heat won't save me or my soul.
If you try to get close,
I'll make you as sick as a dog,
You'll be puking your guts up,
And talking to God.
You'll wish this had never have happened.
(I wish I could remember the last three years of my life)
I still wish I had heard the voice in my head.
(You can't touch a thing, without it bursting into flames)
Your hands are raw and blistered.
Now that I have a conscience and someone to blame,
I'll try my best to remember the fact.
That you were the spark that tore us apart.
These hands are scarred,
You've played your part.
Leave us to pick up the pieces,
Leave us alone.
I knew I'd have to deal with prejudice.
(Being beaten down for the parasites that make me,
There's only one thing that I hate more than lying to you.
It's lying to the face in the glass.
That's all I'm good for.
Lying to myself.
And I'll put my head in my hands and my elbows on my knees,
I'll wish you never been born and you meant nothing to me,
Without the rats in my brain,
My friends are easier to see,
I know that being honest is the way I want to be.
I'm no longer kept awake by demons while I try to sleep,
The storm on my mind has given way to calmer seas.
I was the living, breathing meaning of hypocrisy.